Depression & Disappointment

Mom Hash (not me ~ my mother-in-law) has been clinically depressed for quite a while -- over 6 months. She's been on Prozac & Ativan for about 6 wks & they are finally starting to help. She is still fragile emotionally -- weeping, insecure, anxious -- but there has been progress. She is recognizing that the black days are lessening and she has "normal" times almost every day. During the times when she is having the most difficult time, I've stayed at their house -- often days at a time. This seems to give Mom comfort and a bit of relief to Dad. He has borne the weight of her depression, panic attacks and tears without understanding what was happening. The panic attacks seem to be over, and now that I've been able to explain things a bit as well as stay with them, Dad has been able to get out some and take a few breaks. Mom has found that many of her friends and acquaintances have gone thru depression -- which is surprising to her, but also comforting. She isn't the only one to experience this. With time and continued work, I don't doubt she will have a full recovery.

Dave has been working very long hours. As a result of having to cover for so many jobs and clients, some of the details have been forgotten. He talked to Steve & Paul about needing an assistant. In typical corporate fashion, Dave has to justify, explain and quantify the need for an assistant. Rather than spending time to talk it thru & determine the needs, it will take months and months of more long hours, details dropped and frustration before a decision is made. In the meantime, Dave depends on me to help him get things done, which means I can't get things done at home or elsewhere.

AND, as a result of not having an assistant and being responsible for so many jobs, Dave will have to work during his vacation. It's a good thing we hadn't made travel plans! He'll have to go in during the evening -- when there isn't anyone to distract him. But, he'll also have to work on some job sites as well as fly to Nashville for a site visit. So, we wont' be able to do the things we had planned to do.

We have also come to realize that we probably won't be able to build our home & move to the Oregon coast for 8-10 years. More and more, we are realizing that we need to be available for our aging parents (particularly his) and that he needs to put in more time at the company to get it stabilized & profitable. I'm OK with the delay. It's disappointing, but still do-able. That would mean I'll be 60 or so when we move -- which is a normal time to do that. It isn't time for Dave to retire yet. And, it gives us more time to get our finances in order.

Still have tons of laundry to do -- wash, dry, fold & put away. Not to mention the baskets of already clean clothes to put away. The spare room still isn't done. The desk in the dining room is still loaded with papers. The spare room in the basement is still cluttered with old files & junk. The garage and barn are still cluttered with junk to be cleaned out. Guess we're going to need the extra years to get it all done.